CONTENTS:
LOCKDOWN
SCHOOL
EXPERIENCE WITH CORONAVIRUS / COVID-19
FEELINGS
GRIEF
LOCKDOWN
POEM (FOR children at home)
From My kids to your kids!
It’s been ages now that we’ve stayed home,
Some days, all we want to do is moan!
Some times we cry, and sometimes we scream,
And sometimes we just sit and eat ice-cream!
We’ve thought up some tips for surviving lockdown,
Things we can do while we can’t go to the playground…
(Watch the 2 videos below)
school
poem (FOR children at school)
written from the perspective of a child
Things look a little different now, some things have changed,
Some things have disappeared, and some have been rearranged.
We try not to bump into each other, when we are at school,
We take turns and learn to wait - that’s one of the biggest rules!
We go to school at different times, and my family doesn’t come in through the gate,
We wait to join our bubble and try really hard not to be late!
But inside the school we still have fun, we laugh and run and play.
We read and draw and create new things …and wash our hands all day!
Some days I feel excited and everything I do feels fun,
Some days I love to sit and be surrounded by everyone.
Other days I feel sad and I’m not always sure why,
And other days I’m angry, I scream and shout and cry.
My world has changed a lot and it felt like it changed overnight,
So, I remind myself that feeling these different emotions is actually alright.
It’s healthy, it’s natural, it’s my mind and body learning,
To understand how to stop and rest, while the world keeps on turning.
So next time I feel worried, and I’m not sure what to do.
I’ll turn to someone I trust, to hug or chat it through.
coronavirus / covid-19
A POEM FOR THE CHILD/CHILDREN YOU LIVE WITH to be given IF YOU get symptoms of COVID-19
(WRITTEN FROM THE PERSPECTIVE OF THE PERSON WITH COVID-19)
This pesky Coronavirus is making people ill,
If it catches me then I’ll need to keep still.
I probably won’t be able to talk,
And I’ll stay in bed unable to walk.
I won’t be able to have kisses or cuddles,
But when I’m better I’ll want ALL the snuggles!
We might have paramedics knock on our door,
They’ll be covering their bodies from their face right to the floor!
But there’s a smile under the mask they wear,
And they’ve come to see us just because they care.
The ambulance they arrive in is big and bright,
So, sometimes it can give you a fright!
But in that ambulance is the safest place to be,
They can look after people like me.
If I take a ride with them I’ll wave goodbye to you,
But in my imagination I’m giving you squeezy cuddles, too!
You might feel worried, confused, scared or sad,
You might have lots of questions you want answering real bad!
Whoever is looking after you might not know what to say,
Instead, they might just cuddle you, or sit and play, or pray.
Just know that whatever you feel at this time it’s okay,
Focus on doing what your mind and body wants, to get you through the day.
That might be drawing, colouring, or watching TV,
It might be cuddling your teddies, or sitting in your favourite tree.
No matter how you’re feeling,
Just remember you’re not alone.
I’m thinking about you, missing you, and sending all my love to you at home.
children who have already experienced a family member with covid-19
(written from the perspective of the person with covid-19)
This pesky Coronavirus made me ill,
It caught me, and I needed to keep still.
I found it really hard to talk,
And I stayed in bed, because I couldn’t walk.
I couldn’t have kisses - not even cuddles,
(But when I’m fully better I’ll want ALL the snuggles!)
We had paramedics knock on our door,
They covered their bodies from their face, right to the floor!
But there was a smile under the mask they had to wear,
And they came to see us just because they care.
The ambulance they arrived in is big and bright,
It’s completely natural that it can give you a fright.
But in that ambulance was the safest place to be,
They’re the best at looking after poorly people like me.
I took a ride with them and waved goodbye to you,
But in my imagination I was giving you squeezy cuddles, too!
You might have felt worried, confused, scared or sad,
You might have had questions you wanted answering real bad!
Whoever looked after you might not have known what to say,
Instead, they might have cuddled you, or sat to play, or pray.
Just know that whatever felt at that time, it’s okay,
You focused on doing what your mind and body needed, to get you through your day.
That might have been drawing, colouring, or watching TV,
It might have been cuddling your teddies or sitting in your favourite tree.
No matter how you felt,
Just remember you were never alone.
I was thinking about you, missing you,
And sending all my love to you at home.
Now that I’m starting to feel better, and I’m back at home with you,
It’s okay for you to still feel scared, that was a lot that we all went through.
So, come to me when you’re feeling sad, or when you don’t know how you feel.
We can cuddle and I can remind you, all those different feelings help our hearts to heal.
Feelings
It’s completely natural to feel a lot of different feelings on the same day, or wake up feeling something completely different to how you did the day before. It’s also perfectly natural to feel just 1 or 2 feelings most of the time. during Coronavirus, we can often feel different feelings to the people around us because our world has suddenly changed and all children and grown ups are having to live and work differently. this is okay. it’s natural for us to need some time to figure out what’s happening. The most important thing to remember is we are surrounded by love even when we might feel lonely, and that the teachers, friends, family that we miss will be missing us too and looking forward to seeing us again.
*The feelings listed below are specifically related to our situation in the world right now. We run through more feelings related to all areas of life in the 52 week mental health and well-being curriculum available on YouTube.
More information can be found here…*
how do you feel?
happy…
Happiness feels amazing. It’s when you can’t help but smile. You might feel like you want to stay in this moment forever because it just feels so good! You might feel happy when…
you’re spending time with people you love,
you’re learning something new that excites you,
you’re doing something that you just love to do (colouring, drawing, playing, singing, dancing, meditating, watching your favourite movie, listening to the birds, watching the clouds, climbing a tree, swimming/splashing in the sea)
you hear a joke that makes you laugh
you hear some really good news
you have a cuddle
A lot of the time, happiness can take away a lot of worries, a lot of stress or pressure you might feel, sometimes for a long time and sometimes for a few moments.
Happiness can come and go quickly, or it can come and stay for a while.
You can feel happy and sad really close together - you might be missing someone which makes you feel sad, but someone tells you a joke which makes you laugh. It’s okay to smile even when you miss someone, it doesn’t mean you have stopped missing or loving them.
sad…
Sadness can be difficult to feel. It doesn’t always feel comfortable and so sometimes we try not to feel it. But feeling sad is so important. You might feel sad when…
Someone you love is poorly
You are missing your friends and family
someone says something that hurts you
someone does something that hurts you
you can’t do something you really want to do
you don’t understand why the people who look after you have said no to something you wanted to do
Your mind and body knows what it wants and needs, so if you feel sad then the best thing you can do is to find somewhere that brings you comfort (a favourite chair / bed / quiet space) on your own or with someone you love and trust who will sit with you while you feel sad. You might want to be on your own or you might want a cuddle, we are all different so do what feels right for you in that moment.
Feeling sad won’t last forever even though sometimes it feels like it will.
You might slowly feel more and more sad, or you might suddenly feel extremely sad - both are natural and okay.
Your body might want to sit quietly, it might want to cry, it might want to scream - all of these things are natural and what your body needs to do.
excited…
Feeling excited is another one that feels so good! You might feel excited when…
You get the opportunity to learn about something you love
You get to play your favourite game
you will get to see someone you love soon
it’s your birthday soon
thinking about the next time you can go to your favourite place
Excitement usually fills your body with energy so you might jump around, do a little dance or run around the house to use up all that energy bouncing inside of you!
You can feel other feelings at the same time as excitement, these can be other feel good feelings like happiness, or ones that can be difficult to feel like worry.
It’s natural to feel lots of different things, and for memories to pop into your head and change how you’re feeling.
So, make the most of all the feel-good feelings like getting excited!
worried/anxious…
Feeling worried can be a difficult one, and sometimes we don’t even know we’re worried! We usually feel worry in our bodies in ways such as: FEELING YOU NEED A WEE A LOT BUT EITHER NONE OR NOT MUCH COMING OUT WHEN YOU GO TO THE TOILET, FEELING BUTTERFLIES IN YOUR TUMMY, FEELING HOT AND START SWEATING, YOUR HEART BEATING FAST, NOT BEING ABLE TO TALK, WANTING TO SCREAM, WANTING TO HIT SOMETHING OR SOMEONE.
Depending on your personality and how you’re feeling, you might feel worried about…
Meeting new people or meeting people you know after not seeing them for a long time
going to a party
how things might have changed at school
returning to a hobby (dancing / swimming / gymnastics / martial arts)
how people will react to something you have said or done
…And sometimes, you might not know what you’re worried about!
We all have different personalities, so the things that you feel worried about, your friend might find exciting. That’s okay. We were all made to support each other and help each other out when one of us is feeling a difficult emotion.
A big thing you can do to help your worries is to talk to someone you love and trust about what you are thinking and feeling. It’s also pretty cool to write them all down or draw about them. Once you’ve done that, they sometimes pop out of your head and stay on the paper, and your mind and body then feels a lot better. When you talk about them, someone can help you to remember that it’s okay to feel worried and remind you that EVERYONE feels worried about some things. The person you speak to can also build courage within you by standing with you while you talk about and do the thing that is making you feel worried.
Write down the things you can do to remind your mind you are safe and in control.
Feeling worried is our mind’s way of keeping us safe, but sometimes we need to remind our mind that we’re not in danger and we are already safe.
courageous…
Feeling courageous is a pretty awesome feeling. Feeling courageous is when we feel brave, strong and incredible! You might feel courageous when…
you attempt to climb the tree you couldn’t climb before
you stand up in front of other people to talk
you dance / sing / perform in front of other people
you make a plan for when we can all go out again to go down the big slide that looks scary!
Courage, or feeling courageous, makes you feel strong. It makes you listen to your worries, but feel strong enough to have a go at doing the thing that you had been worrying about. Courage makes you stand up tall when you thought you couldn’t before.
scared…
Feeling scared can bring similar bodily reactions as when you feel worried. So, these are things like: YOUR HEART MIGHT BEAT FASTER, YOU MIGHT FEEL HOT AND START SWEATING, YOUR BODY MIGHT SHAKE, YOU MIGHT CRY, YOU MIGHT WANT TO SHOUT, YOU MIGHT NOT BE ABLE TO TALK, YOU MIGHT WANT TO HIT SOMEONE, YOU MIGHT WANT TO RUN AWAY FROM PEOPLE TO SOMEWHERE YOU FEEL SAFE.
You might feel scared when…
you think about coronavirus
someone you love is poorly
you don’t know when you’ll see other people you love again
you are with someone in your home you don’t know or trust
watching/listening to the news
the people you live with feel scared
When you think about Coronavirus, remember that there are lots of people in hospitals, in ambulances and at the Health Centres, who can listen to and care for the person you love if they become poorly.
It’s perfectly natural to feel scared, so do what makes you feel comforted. This might be… HAVING LOTS OF CUDDLES WITH SOMEONE YOU LOVE, MAKING A LITTLE AREA IN YOUR HOME WITH CUSHIONS, BLANKETS AND SOMETHING YOU LOVE, WHERE YOU CAN GO TO AND SNUGGLE UP AND STOP RUSHING AROUND, TALKING TO SOMEONE YOU LOVE, DRAWING OR WRITING ABOUT THINGS YOU LOVE, DRAWING OR WRITING ABOUT WHAT IS MAKING YOU FEEL SCARED.
The most important thing to remember is only you know how you are feeling. Sometimes, other people will guess how you feel or tell you you don’t feel something, that’s when you need to remember that your own mind and body know best. If you feel scared then you feel scared, there’s no more to it. It’s our role as friends, parents, teachers, carers, to listen to you and support you while you feel scared. By doing this, we can help you walk through the scared times and beat them!
angry…
Feeling angry can fill your body with an energy that needs to come out (similar to excitement) but this energy usually makes you want to shout, scream or hit something/someone. The best thing you can do is walk away from the people around you and stamp the anger out, quickly walk up and down a room, or scream into/hit a pillow or something similar that won’t hurt you or someone else. It’s natural to get angry. But often, our anger leads to hurting someone which causes that person to become angry and you end up going around in circles with everyone angry! So, that helps so much to walk away and return to talk when you’re feeling calm and can talk about or draw what made you so angry. You might feel angry when…
you can’t see your family and friends
you’re tired
the people you live with say or do something you don’t like
you see people doing things you can’t do right now
There are a lot of reasons why you might feel angry at the moment. It might slowly build up until you feel like you burst, or it might come and go quickly throughout the day. Remember, your body is reacting in a way that feels natural. It can feel exhausting to feel angry though, so surround yourself with the things you love to help your mind and body feel calmer and rest.
lonely…
Feeling lonely can make you feel a bit empty. You might feel a pain in your mind and/or body but you don’t know where it’s coming from or how to make it go away.
You might feel lonely when…
You don’t have the people you love around you
you miss your family and friends
YOU DON’T FEEL COMFORTABLE AROUND THE PEOPLE YOU LIVE WITH
It’s so natural to feel lonely. You suddenly had to stop seeing the people you were used to seeing. You suddenly stopped going to school. If you have carried on going to school, everything is different and continues to change. Not all your friends are at school.
It’s also likely that you’ve had to stop doing the things you’re used to doing. Dancing, swimming, martial arts - all those things that were part of your daily/weekly life and routine.
To help you when you feel lonely, try writing down or drawing about the things you look forward to doing when the Coronavirus is no longer around. Also, talk to someone you love and trust and have a cuddle if that makes you feel comfortable, safe and loved.
lost…
Feeling lost is when you might feel a little confused, a little sad, and you’re not sure what to do.
You might feel like you need to make choices but you don’t know what choices to make.
You might not know how you feel.
You might feel like you feel ‘nothing’.
You might feel lost when…
you watch or hear the news
you don’t know how long it will be until you can see people you love
You don’t know what to do in the day
you miss the people you used to see and the things you used to do
you don’t know who to talk to
We usually feel lost when a big emotion washes over us like a wave and it all feels too much; we don’t know what to do.
It’s perfectly natural to feel lost or not know how you feel. Wrap yourself up in something you love the feel of, listen to music that you love, eat your favourite food, look through photos and videos of all your amazing memories. Write and draw about how you feel, and talk to someone you love and trust if you can.
guilty…
Feeling guilty is what we feel when we think we have done something wrong. You might feel guilty when…
you shouted at your sibling but you know they didn’t mean whatever they did
instead of managing to walk away, you took all your anger out on someone you love
you don’t know how you feel about the coronavirus and it brings feelings of guilt
Feeling guilty is a completely natural feeling. It’s needed in order to get us to stop and think about how we think and act with other people. BUT, it’s not good for your mind and body if you keep hold of that guilt and keep on thinking about those times you felt guilty. The best thing you can do is talk to the person/people around you, talk about forgiveness and learning to forgive yourself. (I don’t mean for this to be a plug for the £1/month subscription but we talk in depth about forgiveness in the 52 week curriculum, how to forgive yourself, others, and why it’s so important)
Most importantly, remember we ALL make mistakes. The important thing to do is let yourself feel that feeling of guilt and think and feel about how to make the situation right. After you’ve done your best, accept that you made that situation right and remember you are a good, loving, kind and gorgeous person.
confused…
Feeling confused is when you don’t know what to do. Sometimes you might know why you’re confused and sometimes you just don’t know.
You might feel confused when…
you have been told you can’t go outside but you don’t know why
you have been told that you need to wash your hands a lot but you don’t know why
you don’t understand what germs are
you don’t understand what germs do
you don’t know why you can’t cuddle someone you love
school looks different
you’re asked to do something differently at school
Feeling confused is completely understandable right now, a lot of grown ups are feeling confused, too; and there’s a lot to be confused about! But that confusion won’t last forever. Try talking to the person you live with about what you’re finding confusing. Sometimes, they will be able to help things make sense for you, and sometimes they won’t know the answer; but they can make you feel safer and can chat with you again when they become less confused about the situation.
*I’m aware that a lot of the words written in here won’t relate to children and young people experiencing trauma at home, whether that be due to abuse, poverty or anything else. If you’re concerned about your child and would like to talk, please send an email to me at lisa@thinkhealth.me and I will do all I can to chat through your concerns and support you as a family.*
grief in children
(Words for children)
memories
One of the most precious things in the whole world are the memories that made you laugh, smile, feel loved, feel excited, feel like that was the best time of your life! They can not be taken from you because they are safely stored in your mind.
Memories hold things you can see, hear, smell, taste and touch.
Sometimes, you can’t remember them exactly - but that doesn’t mean they are gone.
Sometimes, the hurt and the pain in your mind that has come from missing that person means you can’t reach those memories at that time, but they are safe. They will burst into your mind when you hear a certain song, visit a place you visited with that person you are missing, or during a quiet time.
Memories will light up your mind and your heart making the love you shared together shine out and create tiny little drops of love to start to fill your heart right up again.
YOUR MIND AND BODY
Your mind and body know how to miss the person you love. They know what to do even when you feel confused.
Your body knows when to cry, when to laugh, when to shout, when to hide under a duvet, when to play music, which music to play.
The most important thing you need to do is let your body feel the feelings that hurt. That’s really, really hard.
Try to not rush into doing lots of different things, but take your time, be slow and concentrate on what you want to do in that moment each day.
It’s natural to feel lots of different feelings, and it’s natural to feel nothing. Missing someone is a huge deal. It hurts. Some days it hurts so bad that you don’t want to get out of bed.
Some days, it hurts so bad that you don’t want to be on your own.
Some days, it hurts so bad that you only want to be on your own.
All of this is natural… but it still hurts.
Surround yourself with things that bring you comfort and make you feel loved. Think of things you love to eat and drink, movies you love to watch, games you love to play, places you love to visit, snuggle in your favourite blanket, listen to your favourite music, smell your favourite scents, have all the cuddles you need to feel all that love you have around you and write and draw about your favourite memories.
THE GROWN UPS IN YOUR LIFE
You might hear other people calling it ‘grieving’. That’s the word usually used by grown ups when someone you love has died. It’s how we let other people know we are hurting, we are sad, we are confused, and life feels really hard right now because we are missing someone we love so much. This also lets other people give you a hug if they can and you want one, offer to help you and your family out, to come closer to you as they care for you while you are hurting.
The people looking after you, whether it’s your mum/dad/brother/sister/cousin/grandma/grandad/aunt/uncle/foster family, they will want to be there for you while you are hurting. Sometimes, grown ups don’t know how to do this, so if you can, talk to them about how you feel. Try writing or drawing in a diary to see if that helps you.
The most important thing to remember is you might feel any or all of the feelings I’ll write just below this, please talk about them to the person you love and trust.
(GROWN UPS - you might need to explain some of these feelings but it’s important to learn and understand them, even for the younger ones).
ANGER, GUILT, SADNESS, SHAME, HAPPINESS, EXCITED, CONFUSION, RESENTMENT, FRUSTRATION, FEAR & ANXIETY, WEAK, STRONG, HELPLESS, HOPEFUL, GLAD, PEACE, CALM - AND MORE.
WHATEVER you feel, it is there for a reason and you can understand that reason when you talk about it.
Sending so much love out to you all,
